A Retrospective

Life is but too short for us to enjoy, for who knows of when our end may come? We must always do what we can to make every day a memorable one, full of joy and laughter and fond memories that never shall be erased from our minds, even in death.
~ Dr. Lionel R. Phantis, historian

Indeed, his words are true.

2010 has been somewhat of a different year. I've seen how every day had something to offer - be it a fleeting moment of joy or a long period of sorrow. I've seen friends and family bend and break, hold on and pull through. I've faced many events - some undoubtedly memorable, others full of misery and despair. I can say 2010 is a prelude of sorts to newer things. Things that may just alter our lives. And what we faced throughout this year is to help us prepare.

Or so I say. Perhaps all of it is true. Hopefully, it isn't. Anyway, let's not digress. This is, after all, a retrospective of the year that is about to end.

The year started off simply enough. Post-SPM I took a quick vacation and had a great outing with some friends before departing for the INTI Youth Empowerment held in their Nilai campus. Pretty much a shorter version of the Prefectorial LTC, but still it was a great event. Had loads of fun, met new friends and such. The empowerment came and went, unfortunately, but soon enough I'll recover it as it was when I was there. I still miss those times.

Then it was off to work. Had a quick tenure at Parkson (if a month is considered quick) at its DIY department, and made more friends. I have to say working there was fun, since I met a lot of good people there who had wit and character. I do miss my time there. Hopefully circumstances would allow me to go back and help.

Soon after I came over to Jusco and worked for two months for Hush Puppies Shoes, though I'd say working there can't compare to Parkson. Sure, I made more friends (jokingly said I'd be famous among them one day XD) and had loads of fun chatting with them, for some reason part of me still lingers in memories of Parkson. Still, Life goes on, and I can't complain about my time here in JJ.

While I worked I also managed to attend two interviews for the Star's EduFund - one at SEGi, the other at KTAR. I had high hopes I'd get to one of these places but unfortunately, both didn't offer a full scholarship. Heart-wrenching at first, but I guess we move on. If ever I did get a scholarship, I wonder how I might be like now. And truthfully, the thought of going to Form Six was... disheartening. But I got used to that fact. Saves a whole lot of money, after all. And money is a luxury I don't have at the moment.

Before long, Form Six Orientation came. By then, I'd had some good money in my pocket, some pretty good results for the SPM and a longing to see old friends again. The Orientation kicked off and I got to know some nice people in the early stages, as well as meet old friends and acquaintances. People like Eva, Jean, Melwin and Wai Keong come to mind. And all those funny games we played, in spite of the fact they were... umm, rather lame?

It was hard to choose between Biology and Computing. But I guess Puan Leela's threats did get me to deciding! XD Jokes aside, I followed my heart to go into Computing, as it's quite an interest of mine, and the next thing I knew they whisked me away to LSS3. Bam, just like that. I didn't think much about my stay there, but as far as things go, anything goes.

From strangers, the lot of us in LSS3 soon got to know one another better. Time has its ways, after all. Especially if you mix a bunch of young guys and girls, fresh from the (so-called) horrors of the SPM and the long honeymoon period that followed it. Everyone connects. Everyone has something to say. And to laugh about. Talk of dinosaurs and cats, teachers and lessons and the like. Girl talk, guy jokes and more.

The Heritage Walk too opened up new bridges. And so did many other things, as well as through other friends you meet or already know. Pretty soon, everyone was getting comfortable with the new environment and warming up to each other. Classes began; the learning process soon followed. Enthusiasm starts high, but pretty soon diminishes once it becomes a daily routine. But still, new friends keep coming in. And it's great to have so many awesome pals around.

But alas, friends came and went. People like Wai Keong got an early chance to leave Form Six and head off to pursue their dreams. Others went through most of it, but ultimately end up leaving because they couldn't take it. Or others migrated to other classes to do something they want to do. LSS3's community soon dropped (and briefly rose) till it now stands at 24. Oh wait, make that 23. Life went on soon after, and classes got on track.

The decision to return to my old coat-of-arms - the Prefects - was probably the best decision I'd made. Sure, it's fun to be a Prefect, but it's way more awesome when you have the right people in it. The same goes for the cocuricullar activities - Wushu felt real fun (it's been too long since I last practised it!) to re-do; Chess, despite the strain of me being Secretary, was still loads of fun nevertheless; Computer Club... well, that's much to be desired. XD

Oh, and let's not forget the Sixth Form Council. Hell, I never did think I'd be part of it, let alone be its Vice President! (I still do wish I'd did more to help out XP) With RJ, Tihn Chern, Ashiran, Mabel, Eva, Cindy, Heng Jian, and Habibi along for the ride, we probably can go the distance - where even our predecessors never did think of going!

And let's not forget after-school fun: whether it's simply hanging out inside or outside school. It all depends on where you go, what you do, and who you're with. From birthday bashes to official meetings, to simple outings and sharing sessions - yeah, lots of things to do after school. Apart from homework. I mean, we're still youngsters trying to have fun in an otherwise boring life. We can't just simply stagnate in silence and solitude.

Sixth Form Night came and went like a fable of sorts. Lots of things to see and gawp about, like during the catwalk. The performances helped rock the night, and soon enough everyone had much of it burned into their memories. Nothing much new, but I believed we had ourselves an exceptional time - after all the hard work and the planning! Even when shit hit the fan a couple of times, we held on and we gave our all. And everything went accordingly, as we hoped. I'm glad of that.

As the first half of the year went by, everything changed. School became a norm, and despite the fact after-school outings were still common place, it became part and parcel of school life. As did studies. Obviously. And classrooms became littered with students following the lessons being conducted, or in other cases lessons being diverted away from its original purpose. It all depends on the teachers. Some we hate, others we love, others we love to hate or vice versa. And it started to become somewhat like Form 5 again. The stress began to push us downwards. But I guess that didn't deter us.

Even in all the fun that's to be had, there's always a fair share of regrets. Hurting friends; hurting loved ones; doing the wrong thing(s); getting screwed up by the Big Kahuna (need I say more?)... one can never have the patience to last. Soon enough, everything starts falling apart. Discontentment, hate, obsession, pride, self-destruction - all this has happened. It's sad to see how we can easily fall apart with only one wrong word. But we can't linger in our regrets. Life must go on. Remember them and speak no more of it. Let bygones be bygones.

I see lots with my eyes, and hear lots with my ears. There are always those that are thoughtful or meaningful in some way. Of two people falling in love. Of great friendships forged through circumstance. Of great times filled with nothing but happiness and contentment. Yes, every young man and woman would go through these.

But for every action there is always a reaction. Of friends secretly wanting to be with someone. Of unsaid emotions. Of pain and sorrow within, unseen without. Of gossip that can threaten one's place in the community. Of resentment and detestment. Of shattered friendships that could have been salvaged. Disheartening indeed. I had my fair share of problems, I can tell you that. Sometimes I do wish I could right those wrongs, but I guess that's how Life goes.

It's just sad to see how people change because of these events. Friends become enemies, lovers become estranged, teachers look down on us students, etcetera. So little is needed to alter the human mind, when so much is needed to build it up to the right level. Such is our weakness that we forego the good in favor of the bad. But that is not mine to reason why.

In the end, Life throws at us some pretty tough obstacles. Sometimes, even those that can very well change our lives entirely. But we need to face them with guts. You can't hide from your problems forever. Just accept them, face them, and get them over with whatever way you can.

As the year came to its close, I began to see things differently and I wished I could have seen it that way long before. Still it takes time before a man can get to a certain level, and I'm still working on it. It all begins with faith in yourself and in God. And then you need to be more positive even against all odds. Life is but a test. An obstacle course. A puzzle. I intend to make the most out of whatever time I have left. Do things I've not done. And hopefully do things not just for the benefit of myself, but more for the people around me.

It surely took quite a while to adjust to this New Life I found. Old habits die hard, after all. But having met so many friends who would ultimately become like siblings of mine, it's not hard to do so. There's always someone I can turn to for advice, no matter how simple it may be. And I'm glad I have so many to call friends.

Soon enough, work piled on us and put us off from having a nice holiday season. We part ways till January next month and everything will return to the routine we know of. For now, we work and we play and anticipate the harsh season that awaits us next year. Me, I'm doing all I can while working in Jusco again to earn some cash for the family's sake. But December is ending soon, and I fear what awaits us in Upper Six. Apart from more shelling from Mr K himself. Sigh.

It's hard to believe Orientation is so far behind us now. We've all gone through thick and thin. We've had fun. We've had bad times. The same goes for me. And now we're on the verge of completing our studies in SMI and leave the comforts of home to head to the University of our choice. And it's hard to believe we'll be parting ways again very soon. But let's not consider that thought for now.

Well, that's quite a retrospective. Hopefully, you guys didn't get lost or whatever in between paragraphs. I don't really write these kinda things as nice as how Nick did his. XD Still, if you managed to read through that's just how the year seemed to be in my opinion. For now, I'll leave you to contemplate on how your year went.

Until next time, adieu and good night.