Monday, May 30, 2011

Stories

Edmund laughed at the punchline delivered by Trey, before the two of them and Trey's girlfriend, Regina, clinking their glasses together and drinking deep of their beer. The bar was pretty empty now save for them, as the bartender was clearing up the table before calling it a day. Carrying a few empty glasses in his hands, he approached the small group, smiling, and told them, "Time's up, friends. Better finish up your last before you leave."

Trey lifted his cup in the direction of the barkeeper. "Thanks for reminding us, ol' Rich," he answered heartily. Setting it down, he turned to face Edmund.

"Shall we?" he asked his old friend.

Edmund dranked the last of his beverage down and nodded. They got up from their seats, leaving their change for their beers, before they walked out the door and out into the streets. As Edmund was about to reach for his car keys, Trey put his hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, dude," he began, a wide smile on his face. "I really enjoyed talking to you again after so long. We should do this more often."

Edmund smiled back, patting the hand on his shoulder. "It's no big deal," came his reply. "If you wanna meet up again you can always give me a ring, alright?"

Trey nodded. "Well, me and Regina are planning to have lunch tomorrow right after church. So if you wanna join us, I'd be happy to have you."

Edmund waved him off with a grin. "It's OK, guys, you go on with your plan. I don't want to interrupt your date."

Regina pouted. "Aw, c'mon Eddie," she said softly. "It's not a big deal, you know?"

Edmund kept smiling, but placed a firm hand on his friend's shoulder. "Look, it's alright," he told them both. "Besides, I've got work to take care of after mass, so I don't think I'd be free to hang out with you two."

Trey looked disappointed, but nodded anyhow. "Ok then," he said, a little sadly. He then raised his palm and added, "But if you do change your mind, you just give me a shout or something, OK?"

Eddie nodded. They shook hands firmly and said their goodbyes. Trey and Regina walked off in the opposite direction, holding hands, staying close to each other. Edmund smiled at the sight of them being so happy together. He pulled his car keys out and walked away.

He sighed to himself, and recalled how he and Trey have been long-time friends for about twenty-four years now. They've gone through thick and thin and have had a treasure trove of good memories to share whenever they met. It was good to catch up with him. After all, it's been three years since Trey left for England to work and his timely return here will do some good.

Trey and Regina, a native of Chelsea, have been together for about two years now and by the looks of it, they really are in a serious relationship. But it's funny, Edmund thought, as he remembered Trey once said he could live easy without a woman by his side. The irony of it made Edmund laugh to himself.

He reached his car and stepped inside it. Revving the engine, he released the brake and drove out onto the quiet road back home.

His mind went back to Trey as he drove. Honestly, it was a real surprise when he was informed about them starting out. That time was the first time he received a call from Trey after a long period of silence, as the both of them were busy building their careers at that point. But still, the call helped them to reconnect after a long time.

Regina seemed like a nice girl. She had the lady-like mannerisms of many British women, but she does know when to let her hair down - like when they went up to the dance floor only a few hours ago. Man, she really hit the spot with those dance moves of hers that it got everyone rocking with her!

Trey's a lucky fella to have found her. The same goes vice versa. They're really a match made in heaven.

Edmund finally reached home, pulling the car up into the porch before killing the engine. He stepped out, shut the door, made sure the gate was closed and then opened the front door and stepped inside. Mom and Dad were probably asleep by now. He went up the stairs and got to his room, turning on the lights to find his room was a mess.

He exhaled deeply. Obviously little David was here, judging by the mess left behind. It was as if a small tornado had suddenly materialized in his room. Mom must have tried to clean up some of it, but Dad probably would have asked her to get some sleep. Edmund didn't blame Dad; after all, Mom's been working hard doing up her garden and the last thing she needs is more work to do.

He began to pick up the mess, placing his novels and magazines back in the shelves and the other stuff into their respective spaces. He then realized his PSP wasn't there where he left it, and then it came to him that David must have been looking for it and then found it stashed away in the drawers. Obviously, he's still caught up with the hype of Patapon.

He picked up a pile of video games from the floor, sauntering over to the computer table and set them down atop it. Opening one of the small cabinets next to the table, he started placing them properly into the cabinet, arranging them by genre. As he was doing that suddenly a small piece of paper fell out from between two of his games.

Where did that come from, he wondered, bending over to pick it up.

He flipped it over. It was a picture of him and Emily.

Edmund was surprised. He thought he had burned everything after they broke up. He remembered watching the picture album burn to nothing but ash.

Then he looked closely. It looked as if it was very old, a yellow discolouration to it. There were some black stains on the left edge of the photo, as if it were singed by the heat. It felt brittle at his touch, like they could just break off at any time. Yes, this must have been from the album. He wondered how this ended up here when it shouldn't even exist anymore.

He looked longingly at it. This was a photo the both of them had taken when they had gone to Miami to meet up with some friends of theirs during the university's summer vacation. It wasn't exactly supposed to have been taken, but cheeky ol' George couldn't resist snapping the camera at them, as they smiled to the camera, her arms wrapped around him.

He rubbed the bridge of his nose as he reminisced those times.

Like how they met. As if it were out of some storybook. He had managed to get her away from a crazy hobo, and they ran all the way from the South Gate of the campus all the way to her dorm, which was almost a mile from where they were. Who knew that from there it would become much more than simple friendship?

He never expected it to happen at all. Not in his life did he actually think of starting a relationship when he got into university. He was actually more focused on doing well and coming out with a degree before pursuing his career as his father's successor to his advertising company.

Never did he thought Fate would have delivered him her along the way. But in any case, it happened. Eight months after the meet, he confessed everything to her. And surprisingly, she agreed. It was a mutual feeling.

Maybe he was a fool to think that it would really last.

Sure, they had a good time throughout their relationship. They were always seen together, whether they were discussing about their assignments or out in the city, holding hands and having a ball of a time. A lot of their friends really thought they could last. They really did look like a perfect match, didn't they? That's what they used to say. That's what they thought.

She was always with him. Whenever she was feeling lonely, she would call him and they would talk for hours as they sifted through their notes. Whenever she was sad, he always knew just how to make her happy again. They could easily lose themselves from reality just by looking at each other. And in fact, after they came back from Florida, they met their respective parents - and both parties seemed pleased about it.

A fairy tale ending, they predicted. But a year and a half into it, she suddenly called it quits.

But why?

Edmund found out the hard way: she was cheating on him, secretly going out with one of his coursemates. One he thought he could trust.

That would explain why they rarely saw each other. But who would have guessed? No one saw this coming. No one expected her to say she had a 'change of heart'. The confrontation that followed soon after he found out turned quite ugly. But thankfully, no one got physically hurt.

She told him she changed. She didn't find their relationship was going in the right direction. And the more she thought about it, the more it convinced her that she wasn't going to be happy with him in the long run. But that was what she said, not him. He truly did love her with all his heart. Wasn't he there for her all the time, even when she almost felt like killing herself? And now all that was left between them was nothing at all? He didn't understand. He couldn't fathom her motives. And he thought she was just lying.

But she wasn't.

She said she couldn't live with all the love she was being showered with. She wanted some freedom. And she found it in the arms of another.

So finally, she decided they had better gone their separate ways. And he agreed.

When he got back to his room later at night, he burned the album. One picture slipped out of its page, God knows how, but it escaped the fire. And he didn't discover it until the next morning.

He looked at the picture again. There may never be a time where he'd be like the Edmund in the picture anymore. Maybe that would be better.

He crumpled it and threw it into the basket, reclining in his chair and sighed heavily. It's been quite a long time since those days. He's put the past behind him. And he's promised himself he wouldn't make the same mistake again. So he chose not to fall in love anymore.

Then it hit him. Didn't it just seem like Trey back in those days? Trey had told him exactly the same thing. But look at him now. He's found someone that changed him. And perhaps even made his life much more enjoyable. Despite what he had said in the past, he ultimately proved himself wrong. "Sometimes, you just can't resist," he said only a few days ago, over a cup of tea. "No matter how much you resist it, once it takes root you can't pull away from it. It's like a parasite, but it doesn't kill you. Instead, it makes you stronger - stronger than you ever thought you'd be."

He considered Trey's words for a while. Maybe he had a point there too. Maybe now just wasn't the time. Was it? Would it?

As he continued to ponder these questions, he began to drift into sleep until finally all he thought of was nothing.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Entries

Frustration
Anger
Dread
Futility

Another stressful day
Full of nothing
But stress
My brain cannot take it no more
It's all going
Down a void
In my head

I wish
I could just relax
All day long
But
I do not have that luxury
Life put paid to such luxuries

But it isn't just that
Anti-social feelings
Hatred and rage
Well up in me
Unavoidably
There are just days
When I ask myself
"Why am I still here
When this world
Has nothing for me?"

Strange as it may sound
This is not the first time
It has happened
But I believe it's normal
When we feel
Downcast
Grieved
Unhappy
Over what happens to us
That we wonder
If there still is purpose
For us

It's inevitable
That we get caught up
In the ruckus
Of all that happens around us
Whether or not
It affects us
Directly
Or indirectly

Discouragement
Disappointment
Resentment
Humiliation
Depression
Discontentment
Disapproval
Mistrust

Negativity spreads
Like a plague
It infects us
Deep in our hearts
And gnaws away
At our conscience
Until we are consumed
By its pestilence
At which
There is no way to redeem oneself

There is no definite vaccine
To this affliction
We can only do
All that in our power
To ensure it does not propagate
It takes will
Courage
Belief
And of course
Faith
To overcome it
A rational mind
Is a healthy mind
For a moment of laxity
Can mislead one
To a lifetime of sin

We are merely human
Such proclivities
To turn to our dark sides
Are hard to resist
Yet again
The machinations of the Devil
In all its subtlety

Take heart
Stand firm
And if ever it may happen again
Do not despair
It is not the end
The end
Is when you believe
You never ever began
In the first place

So I pen it all down
Silently praying for a cure
Silently praying this, too, shall pass
Never a predicament
Silently

Thoughts: Faith And Lessons II

On the 23rd of May I got a message from good ol' Venkeeran:

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."
~ 2 Corinthians 12:9
Anyone can take on a challenge, but the victory goes to the one who overcomes. Draw your strength from God when you feel weak, and your fight will seem less of a battle with God on your side.

There are definitely days when the fight gets too tough. But as what is said above, faith keeps the fire burning bright. No matter what religion you are, take heart: your respective God is always there by your side.

To quote Halo: "Finish the Fight."

Cheers.

Friday, May 27, 2011

Holidays, Plans and Outings

Yes! The holidays are comin'!

So that means more studying! Awesome!

I'm serious here, OK? 'cos I need it. A LOT.

In between, I got some other plans too. A few outings with friends and making plans for a neat FT project.

The first time I'm actually doing something pretty big, actually.

Nervous. Again!

Anyway, better get to work now. I've a lot to do!

Stories

You
You who is born of hate
You who is born of hate, rage and fury
Rise now
Swear your fealty to Khorne
Let his might and fury bless you in the heart of battle

Take up your mantle
Your weapons
Your crown
Go forth
Revel in the bloodshed
For it is your only mission

Bathe in the blood of the fallen
Drink deep in their fear
Strike them as they cower
Pursue them as they flee
Their begs for mercy are meaningless

As is this Universe
There is no true purpose
But to kill
To kill in Khorne's name

So rise now
Champion of Khorne
Rise up
Let the bloodletting begin
Till the entire galaxy is drowned in it

Blood for the Blood God!
Skulls for the Skull Throne!

* * *

This ceremonial mantra was found scrawled on the walls of a Khornate blood shrine found in the city of Veshra on Thrakanis Tertius. Through the investigations of Inquisitor Lord Isaak Heimdor of the Ordo Malleus and his retinue, he had discovered that the many death cults on the planet were secretly making blood pacts with Khorne so that they would spill more blood in the name of the dark god, and as an oath of their allegiance to the Blood God. Infuriated, he led a force of Grey Knights and Inquisitorial Stormtroopers to the planet, aided by his long-time companion Inquisitor Lord Gerhart Frazer and the revered Grey Knight Paladin, Captain Atlas, to wipe out this unholy filth. 


Five weeks into the battle, Heimdor and Frazer uncovered a vast labyrinthine complex beneath the main sanctum of a blood shrine on the outskirts of Porivar. There they found an active daemon gate and were soon beset by a host of Bloodletters, Juggernauts and other daemons of Khorne. In the ensuing battle, Frazer was severely wounded while a third of the Stormtrooper force that followed them were killed. They succeeded in sealing the portal and, after knowing the fate of the planet was sealed, Heimdor declared an Exterminatus on Thrakanis Tertius. Millions of lives were lost, but Heimdor had scored a great victory: years later he found out that Thrakanis Tertius was being used as a staging ground for a so-called "blood crusade" that would be waged by the World Eaters and a mighty host of daemons and cultists.


Had he not have discovered the taint of Chaos in time, perhaps trillions of souls would have been condemned to the eternal servitude of the vicious Blood God of Chaos.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Quickie

Performing this Friday for Teacher's Day.

Current mood? Nervous as hell!

Friday, May 20, 2011

Updates

Even with the exams going on, it's hard not to resist blogging for a bit.

The darkness looms heavily over us, an ominous, invisible force that threatens our very existence. But so long as we have faith and stay strong, united in one common purpose, then we may rise up and break out from this cage we are trapped in.
~ Cardinal Morriad Zaethria, the Church of The Most Honoured Martyr, Patronus Tertius

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Entries

As I sat there
On the bench
Looking at the divergent tracks
One headed to the west
Another to the east
I can't help but think of
Robert Frost
And his poem
"The Road Not Taken"

Specifically:
"Two roads diverged in the wood
And I
I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference"
Should I have expected this?

I looked around
Hoping the stranger would be here
To guide me
But I was alone
Me and the train
N0t any other soul in sight

So here I am
To make that choice
But which one
Will take me to where I wish to go?
If I ended up
Like Frost's persona
Regretful of the path taken
In the end

But how would I know
Until I took one path?

In my mind
The stranger's words whisper
Like a wind song
"Trust in yourself"
He said before
Several stations ago

Suddenly
Like a dirge
The Devil hissed
"Trust your instincts"
Where had his voice come from?

I looked around again
But no one
Not a soul in sight
Just me and the train
Is that so?

I look back
At the fork in the tracks
One leads to destiny
Another to obstacles
Perhaps a lot of them
I will not know
Until the choice is made

But the choice is there now
Am I to live
In regret
In doubt
In fear
Of the future that cannot be seen?

I remembered that
During an event
Only a while back
Whatever it is you say
You are prophesying upon yourself
That means
It will alter your thoughts
Your words
Your actions
It may even
Alter your ending

So should I just sit here
And be content
To just think
About choices
And consequences?
Rather than
Taking action
And hoping for the best
In the process
Of enduring Life
And its challenges

Rather than rot here
Sitting in silence
And doing absolutely nothing
I should be out there
Living my life
'Carpe diem', they say
And I should

The train's horn blares
Signalling
It was time to depart
I stood from my seat
Eyes still fixed
On the bend in the road

Bring it on

So I pen it all down
As the train edges closer
To the fork
Waiting to seize the day
Waiting to see what comes next
Waiting

Thoughts: Faith And Lessons

(Unless you're not a freethinker or liberal, I suggest that you read this to the very end)

Came back from an INFUSE event held some time ago. Many thanks to Venkeeran for the sudden yet meaningful invite. Truly appreciate it, dear friend.

Despite the fact I am not Christian, I am always amazed at the amount of faith the youth of today have for Jesus and God. Like tonight's event, so full of song and praise and fervant belief in the Creator. Oh, words fail to describe such a wonderful scene!

The mini gig was one thing, but the guest speaker for the night - Pastor Rudy - was truly the highlight. He touched upon two very interesting topics: perceptions, the choices that we make, and to look forward and never backward. His words fired up the crowd, and they were entertaining and also thought-provoking at the same time.

So let's see how I can pass his words in my own interpretation. Hopefully, the meaning is still retained.

1. PERCEPTIONS
Two people, who possess the same job, pay, car, etcetera, may be similar at first glance. But what differentiates them are their perceptions.

For example, one of the two mentioned above may come into the office, and complain and crab and blabber and gossip and what-not, about almost anything that bugs his head. The negativity easily diffuses into the office atmosphere, and everyone starts to feel as bad as he does.

But then the other comes along and exclaims out loud: "Man, today is a GOOD day and I'm loving it!" And the next thing you know, the entire office gains a positive mood.

Two people with similar backgrounds. What differs are their attitudes, their perceptions. Should we not be like the positive one? For it is said that whatever we say, it is prophesied as your future. This is more or less what is said in Rhonda Byrne's The Secret, whereby your thoughts decide whether good or bad comes to you. Here, it's words. But even if you're not Christian, there is some truth to what is being said.

Why so? Well, technically, what we say actually influences our actions and thoughts in future because we believe in them. If we look in the mirror and say, "Man, I look terrible," it might stick for a very long time. Unless you change your words from vitriol and disgust into words of encouragement and positivity, you might not move on from where you are now.

2. CHOICES
The choices we make determine our destiny. So was written at the event. Who can deny it?

While one's perceptions points us in the direction that we are going, the choices we make move us to opportunities that will shape our lives - whether these may be in the form of obstacles to overcome, or even moments of utter joy to cherish. It is all in what we choose that counts.

But it's not to say that choices alone are important. As mentioned above, if your perceptions are cloudy and dark you might find yourself stuck in the same spot. You might be successful at that point, but if you want to expand your horizons you may not be able to move any further.

And speaking of choices, there are always times when we have to make difficult choices that may very well alter the course of our future. It may be forgiving someone who has wronged you deeply. It may be kicking an old habit that has been detrimental to you in some way or other. Or maybe it's mending bridges with your parents.

Difficulty is assured. It might just take you days, months or maybe even years just to make that one choice. One choice! But that one choice may be a life-changing event for you. And believe me, it may just turn your life around for the better. So think it through, weigh the options carefully and cast your dice.

3. LOOKING FORWARD
We are usually told to look back on our achievements or memories and take them as examples. (Or some other) While it is a good thing, it must be said that we cannot always hold ourselves back in the past, for we must move on to the future.

How can we just keep lingering in the past? If we hold onto it for too long, we'll only be looking to what we have done then rather than what we can do now. Would that really work? What was then doesn't necessarily mean it would be the same now, nor would methods from the past work again in the future.

Just like the choices we made, should we actually let our regrets and our burdens bog us down deep?

We need to realize that it's no use holding on to old hatreds, old grudges, old memories, etcetera. While some memories should always remain clear in our mind, never let them get the best of you. Never let your thoughts get to you till you prefer to stay in your comfort zone. It is necessary to go out of that zone and venture into something new.

Take heart, people. All you need to have is faith. Whatever your religion may be, always have faith in your religion's principles. If you have doubts, never hesitate to ask your pastor/imam/priest any questions you have doubts on.

Cheers for now!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Thoughts: Questions to Ponder

Watched Jack Neo's "I Not Stupid Too" yesterday (from the date of this posting) and had some thoughts at some of the tear-jerking moments.

At the moment, I can only think of this:

Child Negligence
It is indeed our responsibility - well, I mean parents - to take care of one's children. To shower them with love, affection, care and to teach them the meaning of becoming a responsible person when they become adults.

But what if we neglect their needs? What if we just ignore them, too busy with our own work to spend some quality time with them? Or when they do something wrong; do we listen to them first or act out according to the judgment of others or yourself? How do we know we are right?

Like in the movie, when the young boy was caned for stealing, he told his parents he was just saving up "to buy an hour of their time". Why is it only at the last minute when we realize our mistakes?

Think about it.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Entries

The Devil came again
Only some nights ago
I was sure
He still harbored
A great deal of hate
Towards me and the stranger
After his previous visit
But if so
He did not show it

He sat calmly
Smoking a cigar
A Cuban vintage
As far as I could tell
Still looking crisp
In his shadow black tuxedo
As he stared at me
I couldn't help
But feel deeply
Uncomfortable

"You drive a hard bargain,"
Says he
A grin creased on his lips
One full of malice
I gulped
Not knowing how to reply

"Let's try one more time
Shall we?
All you have to do
Is offer your soul
To me
And in return
I will grant you
Everything you desire
It's as easy as 1, 2, 3"

"Do you really think
I'd just go along
With your schemes?"
I told him
Still a little frightened
By his presence
Where was the stranger
When I needed him the most?

"Of course you would!"
He replied excitedly
Standing from his seat
Looking all invigorated
"Mortals such as yourself
Are too easily driven
To commit sin
To pledge themselves
At the every whim
Of myself and my minions
Who can resist?"

I had to steel myself
If I allow myself to be coaxed
Into his eternal servitude
Nothing could ever redeem me

"The stranger has warned me
Of all your trickery
And your cunning
I won't be easily swayed"

He tsked away
Shaking his finger in disapproval
"No no no no no
We don't want any mention
Of that little old fool
It's obvious
He doesn't want you
To 'lose' your way
To the winning side
I've nothing to lose
By helping you
And he?
He has everything to lose!
So why listen to him?"

He edged closer
His eyes still on me
Like a hawk
A demonic hawk
"What do you desire most?
I know you desire
Something"

From his hands
He conjured an image
That of a woman
Sultry, beautiful, alluring
Someone whose face
Could launch a thousand ships

"I can give you
The most beautiful
And brilliant
Of all women across this world
One whose beauty
Rivals even that
Of the goddesses
Even Aphrodite
Would be envious of this mortal
And she would be yours
And yours alone"

The image disappeared
Replaced by a home
A mansion, in fact
As large as Central Park
"Or I can give you
More wealth than even
The combined riches
Of all the wealthiest men
Throughout the globe
Everything you wish to own
Be it a car, a computer or a company
Will be in your reach"

Another image
Cropped up
A man, presumably me
Surrounded by people
Of many different cultures
"I can give you power
Power beyond anyone's wishes
Power that will make you
The greatest man alive
Everyone will look to you
And say with pride
'There is Calvyn!
The most powerful man
The one who will lead us
To prosperity and peace'
The world will salute you
And millions will scream
Your name every day"

Yet another image
Another man
Surrounded by butlers
And handmaidens
In a palace bedroom
"I can even give you
The most pleasurable comforts
A man can hope for
Relax and unwind
As your every whim
Is answered
At the beck and call
Of an army of servants
Live a life of luxury
Never again will you leave
The solace of your home
Home sweet home"

The image disappeared
He placed his hands
By his side
And sat down again
"Just imagine
That is merely just the beginning
Open up to the possibilities!
What more could you ask for?
Everything
Everything
Has never been so close
To becoming true
And all you need to do
Is just ask
Ask for it"

I stayed silent
The stranger's resolve
Had already been imprinted
In my soul
And besides
I had so much to lose
If I took his offer
Why should I?

He shook his head
"Well, if you remain
Undecided
Then I won't force you
Think it through
Think it with a clear mind
And perhaps
You will see it
From my perspective
Toodles"

He vanished
In a bright flash of fire
Leaving nothing
But a blackened stain
On the floor

I sighed
Will this never end?
So I pen it all down
Hoping the Devil will stop
Hoping I will not fall
To his deceit
Hope

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

More Thoughts

On the recent topic discussed, I asked a friend of mine about it and he wrote this silly fictional letter, depicting a person's correspondence to a friend to break their friendship:

To Mr John Doe, 
It is with deep regret that I inform you of my decision to sever all forms of connection whatsoever with you effective immediately from the date you receive this letter. 
After thinking long and hard for the past few days I had come to the conclusion that, despite our closeness that goes back to many years now, there are no benefits whatsoever for both parties in continuing to maintain these mutual ties that we have shared. 
I have already found a suitable candidate to fill in your position and trust that he and I will continue to make great progress together over the course of Time. 
I humbly thank you for all your service and honesty throughout our friendship and hope that, in future, you will not contact me ever again. Thank you. 
Yours sincerely,
ADAM ROE

If I ever encountered such a letter, I might just laugh myself to death.

This letter may be formal, but it still implies one thing: inherent mistrust. And that would only mean the end of everything between both people.

Who would want that?

But in any case, if ever I stop corresponding with you then do forgive me. I might just be too busy with loads of work and all.

Cheers for now!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Thoughts

Friendship. Can't live with it. Can't live without it.

I still remember how I advocated the importance of friendship, just as much as how I stress on its importance to myself every single day, whether directly or otherwise. "Be the kind of friend you'd want to have" and all that sort of thing.

But in light on my recent opinions of Mankind's foibles and hypocrisy, I have been doing some thinking.

Let's assume a person decides to distance himself away from a select few individuals simply for his own greater good, would that actually imply hypocrisy? Even if he decides to distance himself from people who do not help him change positively, but are still jolly good people to have a simple conversation with, would this too be called hypocrisy?

So much of our actions in the past have inadvertantly caused a lot of misunderstandings in the present. In fact, things have become so muddled up that it's hard to determine what is real and what isn't. Like how the UN Security Council's majority were for the "no-fly zone" policy in Libyan airspace and those against the motion. Some quarters - especially the US - are calling it a necessary evil. Others condemn it with every passing day.

So what is really the right thing? Does it matter to perspective, be it a common or a divergent one? Does it have to be accepted by society's norms? Does it need approval?

So: friendship. Can't live with it, can't live without it.

There is no excuse as to breaking a friendship without a valid reason. I still recall a friend of mine (well, once was) removing me from her Friends' list on FB just for one little mistake. Can't blame anyone on this - hypocrisy, remember? But then again are we entitled to just cut off a friendship in such short notice? Or what then?

Everyone has the right to know their mistake(s), just like how criminals must know what they're being charged of before being taken to court. So shouldn't we embrace that methodology? Why not? Simple enough: one, our ego prevents us from saying things that make them AND us look bad; two, we're too pig-headed to say it out; three, it's the only thing that disallows people to bitch about others. And face it, Man thrives on gossip and small-talk. Every day you hear of it. And it never gets tiring - to the majority of the world.

So, caught between a rock and a hard place. Friendship has suddenly become a social hazard. Hypocrisy reigns supreme, the clear winner.

John Maxwell states that it's necessary to break off from people who are negatively impacting our life. The question is, how does one go about doing that without seeming hypocritical or offending to the other party? That's the challenge.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Entries

Watching the news
As the train trundles on
Such disheartening events
That are unfolding
In these recent days

I sit in my cabin
Troubled
As Harley chases a ball
He know not
What is going on
But blame him I don't

History
Has been marked
By centuries of bloodshed
That which
In my opinion
Were pointless efforts
What drives us
To such barbarity?
To commit sin?
To shatter our fragile peace?

They coveted power
They desired wealth
They wanted fame
Fame and glory
They even wanted
To be venerated
As gods
The list goes on

The door slid open
And the stranger came in
Footsteps as silent
As a wild cat
He looked at the TV
And smirked

"You have a lot of time,"
I tell him
Condescendingly
He gazed at me
And shrugged
"I take the time,"
He simply stated
Taking a seat opposite mine
Pouring a cup of tea
For himself

"I see the news worries you,"
He said softly
Smiling at Harley's antics
"Indeed it does,"
I reply with a heavy sigh
"And you?
You don't seem to be concerned"

"I've grown to live with them,"
He answered nonchalantly
Sipping at his drink
And then setting it down
On a coaster
Where did that come from?

"Really?"
I was surprised
The world is still his home
How can he not concern himself
With what we are doing

"Simple, really
I tell myself
'This is not my doing
I am not responsible for it'
And I let it slide
Easy as that"

"But aren't the people
Still responsible
For what their leaders
Are to decide?"
Says I
But he waved it off

"Nay, young one,"
Says he, eyes burning bright
"It's more complicated
We are all to be blamed
For not playing a role
In preventing all the bloodshed
The anarchy
The sorrow
The misery
The agony
The pain
It cannot go away
So fast"

"You contradict yourself,"
I tell him
Reminding him of his earlier remark
He nods, clearly remembering
"I do not judge myself
In the matters
That do not relate to me"

I raised an eyebrow
Quizzical
"You confuse me, stranger
I'll give you that"
He grinned
And raised his glass
"I try," he commented
Slyly
And drank down his tea

"But what's important
Is that Humanity
Does not linger
On its past failures
Merely, move on
And use those failures
As sharp reminders
That they have a long journey ahead
All that needs change
For all the good to return
Is a change in attitude"

"Attitude?
How so?"
I ask him
But he was already up
And was about to leave
"You're not leaving
Until you answer me, stranger"
He turned to look back
Smiling
"In time, young one
You'll understand
But-"
Here he raised
His index finger
And pointed it to me
"You have not
The difference maker
In you yet
So be patient"

He stepped out of the cabin
Closing the door
Leaving me perplexed
More than ever
I got up
Opened the door
And when I looked
There was no one
Not a soul

From the next cabin
One of the passengers
Came out
I went to him
"Excuse me, sir
Have you by chance
Seen a man
Dressed very smartly
Pass by the corridor"

The passenger gave me
A look
"I'm afraid not," he said
Before he trotted off

I sighed
Scratching my head
The difference maker?
Not yet in me?
What does that mean?

I return to the cabin
And I pen down
The words of the stranger
Wondering what he meant
Wondering what is
This difference maker
Wondering

Penguins!

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